Justin Ryker Swick

Justin Ryker Swick

Tuesday, November 15, 2011

A Letter From Daddy

I don't have much time to write today.  But I do want to say how much I love my husband, he has been my rock through all of this.  I am so glad God chose him for me.

Also and update on the publishing of Justin Jesus, we have not gotten the final draft sent into the publisher yet, I still have a few things to add to it (prologue and acknowledgements) and I need to get all the letters added to it, then we should be good to go.  Obviously getting it done by Christmas is out of the question, but it WILL be done by Justin's first birthday.  I will keep you posted on the progress! 

Dear Justin,
There were so many things I wish I could tell you, so many things I wish I could do with you. I will never forget the precious times I got to spend with you. Holding you for the first time, watching you fight from the beginning. I can remember how strong your mom was being with you in the hospital. I know how much she loved you. She could not stop talking about you and how precious you were to both of us. I remember when your mom called my work, to tell me that you were going to get to come home. My excitement grew with each minute and each mile I drove. I remember the few nights where we fell asleep on the couch and your mom would wake us up(well me anyway) to tell me to come to bed. Days seemed to be filled with new excitement. I remembered the times when you would smile, it brought so much joy and happiness to us. All the little things you did without having knowledge of it, how our little guy brought happiness to not only your mom and dad, but to your brothers as well. They both loved you and cared so much about their little brother. I remember your sweet baby smell, then I look for your blankets to remind of how close you are to me. Knowing that I will not get to play with you when you are older, play catch, shoot hoops, or take you to the tractor store which is your brothers favorite activity when we go to town hurts me because I know what’s missing. But I know you see it all from where you are, I just wish you would get to do it with them. There are nights when I wake up and I think I hear you cry, it’s hard for me, but I know where you are your cry is a happy one, but more of a giggle. Mom and Dad love you with unconditional love. I find myself thinking of you and don’t have to wonder what your mom is thinking because I already know. When I have my rough days I close my eyes and I see your smile, and at that time I feel that you letting me know that everything is going to be ok and that you are safe. I know that you will always be a part of our family, but our family has an angel watching over his family from heaven. You will always be in my heart, my prayers, and always in my thoughts, but I know that you are among the angels in heaven. Your dad will always remember your first smile, the first time I heard you giggle, and how you made me feel when I held you. You will always be one of Daddy’s little boys. I love little buddy, keep an eye on your brothers, your mom, and me.

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